a behind-the-scenes look at my toasting methods

i posed the fans of sandwichesimade a question today:

do y’all have toasters, toaster ovens, or neither?

it is national burrito day in the united states today so toast is the last thing on the minds of sandwichesimade’s largely-US-based audience.

unable to perform defensible quantitative research on account of an insufficiently-sized sample and relieved having identified the reason behind my lower-than-usual response rate, i turned my energies to lunch.

here is how i made a second tomato sandwich, with a behind-the-scenes peek at how i toast my bread.

1. stick it to the toaster lobby. place two slices of bread on a warm pan.

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2. blow away your production crew with your knife skills.

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3. take pride in your defiant act while throwing darts at a photo of a toaster lobbyist (not pictured).

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4. throw caution to the wind. it’s good to let loose sometimes. don’t throw your mayo to the wind, spread it on your toast.

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5. blanket tomatoes on your toast with the same care you would swaddle a baby.

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6. sprinkle salt on a leftover slice and eat it raw while burning an effigy of a toaster lobbyist (not pictured).

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7. sprinkle salt and tj’s everyday seasoning with the unrestrained enthusiasm of a deranged psychopath.

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8. a star second tomato sandwich is born

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